...Fishy? (Sorry, I can't remember the title)

In the last couple weeks, I've become concerned about the whole "blogging every day" plan. I thought that it was impossible to run out of thoughts, and I was right. However, it is easy to forget bloggable thoughts by the end of the day, leaving me with mediocre thoughts like "well, I ate a hot dog a couple days ago, people probably want to know about that." So I blog them, all the while knowing that they don't, but that I have nothing else to write because of the short term memory issues.

It's sad that yesterday I wrote all about my dreams of a poor lobotomized pet fish, only to realize today that I'm already living his life, except not a fish, which is good because I live in air, so were I a fish, I'd be both forgetful and dead, which would be significantly worse than my current situation. The point is, my memory is so bad that while writing about fish memory, it didn't even trigger me to think that maybe I'm already a lobotomized fish. Mostly it made me think, "Fishys are fun". Then it made me think, "Crap, what was I just writing. Wait, who cares? Happy song."

So about the blogging everyday. I thought that maybe the response I needed was to stop the everyday blogging, but then I thought, "No Sharon, you're not a quitter, except for when you are, but you aren't right now." But what I do think I need to do is change my goal from "...until untimely death" to "...for 1 year". I think 1 year is reasonable. Then I can space it out, if I so choose. Obviously it's with the stipulation that if untimely death occurs first, I'll probably stop then and not wait for the year.

I think it's okay to change the rules at this point. It's like when I was a teen and I would say, "I'm never going to drink, or at least I don't think I will at this point, but in the future, I might change my mind." I really did say this once to my grandparents, who, I like to imagine, respected my absolute lack of resolve. I think it's fair though, I don't need to make decisions for future Sharon, she can make her own decisions. It's not like you see her making choices for me. If past Sharons got to call all the shots for future Sharons, all the power would be in infant Sharon's hands, and I would probably wander through life putting anything within reach in my mouth and still wear a diaper for convenience. But I don't, because that would be ridiculous. The point is, I won't blog forever either, just because 27 year old Sharon thought that would be a bright idea. I will try for the year though, because goals are fun.

Speaking of goals, my goal today is to clean my stupid room, but I'm not posting another picture because of the embarrassment. I will, however, promise myself that if I don't clean it tonight I'll post a picture tomorrow to shame myself into doing it. I suspect life would be easier if I didn't have to be a sneaky parent to myself. Also, it would be easier with a clean room. I also might have more crayon drawings then, because messy rooms inhibit crayon drawings. I would explain the mechanism, but actually, I won't.

Happy song...Don't Forget, by Brett Dennen. It got me through the fall, when I was so busy that I was generally concerned about passing out in the street on my walk home (I didn't though, which was good). I like to imagine that I'm singing it to myself, because as much as it feels great to have other people believe in me, it's not a sufficient replacement for me doing it for myself. I suggest you do the same.