Your instructions most likely mean nothing to me

Everyday I learn new things...slowly. For example, I started playing ultimate frisbee, because I thought "why not?" Well, why not is because I can't really throw or catch a frisbee very well. It's one of those many sports where I am yet to choose a dominant hand, so I just switch it up every little bit, leading to inadequate skills with either hand. It was only my second game yesterday. In the first game I learned to run a lot, mainly away from the frisbee as soon as it was in our possession, so I wouldn't mess anything up.

Yesterday, I learned about "cutting". I'd heard the term for awhile, mainly while on the field, but had no idea what they meant when they shouted "cut, Cut, just CUT SHARON!" So, as I do in response to any instruction I don't understand, I knew I could either (a) freeze like a deer caught in headlights so that I at least wouldn't do the wrong thing, even though it would make it pretty much impossible to do the right thing, or (b) run around erratically and hope that at some point my random movements might accidentally imitate this "cutting" thing. I went for option B since last week I'd learned the most important rule is to run a lot.

Apparently it wasn't very helpful, and I was told to try to turn in 90 degree angles. Like a robot. Well, they didn't say like a robot. I said "Like a robot?" and they said, "Sure..." Frisbee is hard.

Yesterday I learned about the importance of being a robot. Today I learned that storage rooms are fun. At least storage rooms full of disembodied arms and skeletons are fun if I have my camera.

...and you didn't believe me about the disembodied arms.

The following series of pictures is entitled: "Skeletons don't know how to not be creepy for more than an opening line when hitting on a girl."

"Oh, hi there, you look nice tonight.""Have you noticed I'm naked?"
"Are you into necrophilia? Cause I'm totally into bio-philia."

Then my friend Saylinds Selfish took another picture of me with my skeleton friend. It is important to note that this was taken with her yelling, "Look in love! No! In Love, In LOVE! Okay, that's probably close enough."
"Look in love" is apparently as mysterious to me as "Cut, damn you, cut". That's sad. Also, what is sad is that the skeleton did better than me.

Happy song of the day: Mary Ellen Carter by Stan Rogers. After my mopey weekend, it's a good song, because I can bounce back from anything, because, like the Mary Ellen Carter, I'm a ship. Wait, that's not right. But, I'm kind of like a ship, because I float really well. Sometimes I fear I might lose too much weight and not be able to float anymore, but I think I would probably be able to gain it back pretty quickly eating plankton and such. I can eat pretty fast, so I bet with a little effort I could gain it back before I drown. And that is how I'm like the Mary Ellen Carter.